Worm with Glasses

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Sep 4, 2017

How to be Miserable

One very sad red ping-pong ball.

Back in May, CGP Grey posted a video based on Randy J. Paterson’s book How to Be Miserable: 40 Strategies You Already Use .

After watching the video, I had to read the book. Both Rosey and I finished it in one night. Within his 40 lessons, we each found a least a few that applied to us.

The book is structured as a series of 40 “lessons” on how to be miserable. Of course we’re not trying to be miserable, but following these lessons tend to make one miserable. To be happy, do the opposite!

Mr. Paterson’s lessons are:

  1. Avoid All Exercise
  2. Eat What You’re Told
  3. Don’t Waste Your Life in Bed
  4. Live Better Through Chemistry
  5. Maximize Your Screen Time
  6. If You Want It, Buy It
  7. Can’t Afford It? Get It Anyway!
  8. Give 100 Percent to Your Work
  9. Be Well Informed
  10. Set Vapid Goals
  11. Rehearse the Regrettable Past
  12. Blame Inward, Give Credit Outward
  13. Practice the “Three Bad Things” Exercise
  14. Construct Future Hells
  15. Value Hope Over Action
  16. Become a Toxic Optimist
  17. Filter for the Negative
  18. Cultivate Your Presence—Elsewhere
  19. Insist on Perfection
  20. Work Endlessly on Your Self-Esteem
  21. Become an Island Unto Yourself
  22. Give Them What They Want
  23. Measure Up and Measure Down
  24. Play to Win
  25. Hold High Expectations of Others
  26. Drop Your Boundaries
  27. Bond With People’s Potential, Not Their Reality
  28. Demand Loyalty
  29. React to Their Motives, Not Their Messages
  30. Cultivate and Treasure Toxic Relationships
  31. Keep Your Eye on the Small Picture
  32. Let Your Impulses Be Your Guide
  33. Look Out for Number One
  34. Duty First, Life Later
  35. Live the Unlived Lives of Others
  36. Stay in Your Zone of Comfort
  37. Avoid Solitude
  38. Choose Fashion Over Style
  39. Pursue Happiness Relentlessly
  40. Improve Yourself

I’d highly recommend watching Grey’s video and then reading the book. It will change how you view yourself.